Saturday, June 21, 2008

Showing Up

An update on the babydaddy sitch. I went to Eugene on my weekend to see him, a couple days ago. I came bearing nothing more than a jug of spirulina juice, some orange flowers picked from the side of the road, and a bottle of flora-filled yogurt, for his ailing gut. O, and a piece of Labradorite, in the shape of a teardrop (thanks Jen). He got some kind of terrible stomach infection, but now he's getting better, and seems in good spirits. That's in spite of the unnatural hole in his torso that leaks blood and other bodily material on a regular basis. The purpose of the jaunt down to a Eugene hospital was not to rekindle a long-lost love, or even really talk at all about the awful mess we find ourselves in.

It's just that sometimes the best thing you can do for someone is Show Up.

Maybe he doesn't deserve my presence in his life, or my concern about his well-being. In spite of all the well-meaning advice i get on the subject, the way i deal with him-and-me is a decision only i can make. But like i said, sometimes the one thing we can do to help people is show up when they really need us. Even if it does cost you more than you can afford, with gas prices at four bucks and counting. Even if your heart screams that they don't deserve you. Even if you're still pissed about all the things they have yet to do, all the dues they have yet to pay.

You can show up.
You can look someone in the eye.
You can even grab someone's hand and squeeze it a little, to show them that you have the capacity to forgive.

In this case, i think it did more to heal him than all the invasive medical procedures he endured. The powers of karma are so strong, they're almost incomprehensible. And they can crack the whip at the most poignant of times, as i have seen over the past week. But the powers of presence -- and forgiveness -- are ones we have total control over, and ones that can change the world.

Show up for someone today. Or as soon as you can.

"The great work of our time is planetary healing. The planet is our collective being (the biosphere, life on Earth), and we contribute to the work by sending our healing energy to the people and things around us. This can be as specific as tilling the soil or laying on hands, or it can be as general as maintaining an open heart and a loving spirit. What is noticable is that more and more of us are involved in the conscious practice of healing. We are to some extent, sometimes, aware of ourselves as small, individual parts of the quickening process that is waking up our collective being." Paul Williams

"Surrender is inner acceptance of what is without any reservations. If you have lived long enough, you will know that things “go wrong” quite often. It is precisely at those times that surrender needs to be practiced if you want to eliminate pain and sorrow from your life." Eckhart Tolle

2 comments:

Melissa said...

Just stumbled onto your blog while looking for Single Mom blogs...love this post. You inspired me to show up with some gut helping yogurt the next time I see my ex :) Thank you! BTW ..do you make your own spirulina juice?

Nicole Vulcan said...

Melissa --
I don't make my own, but it would be fun to try... though I've said that about kombucha for a long time too, without doing anything. Yeah, the yogurt might help with the ex anxiety, unless of course you are lactose intolerant... =)